In Conversation: toast on ‘pony’
Marcus Hidalgo has come a long way since he began his career as toast in 2019. It’s only been a few years since then, but according to the artist, that period of time has been pivotal. In fact, Hidalgo feels he has grown more in the past year than at any other time in his life. After graduating from college, relocating to Nashville and becoming a father, he looks back on the person he was years ago with a mixture of sadness, love and understanding. Things were simpler back then: there were mistakes to be made, chances to be taken and lots of friends to do it all with. Hidalgo’s early work captured that season of youth as vividly as fireflies in a bottle, and his listeners resonated with it, too. Whimsical alt-pop singles like “wii” and “fun” paved the way for toast’s sensational debut album, marcus, why’s your name toast?? — a carefree, genre-agnostic record that helped the artist amass over 1.6 streams on Spotify alone. Now, a year after his debut record, the Nashville-based indie artist shares a mature and eclectic sequel in pony - a vivid, emotionally-charged record that explores both the joys and disappointments of growing up. Toast opened up about the stories behind pony, his transformative growing-up journey, and more.
How long did it take to record pony, and where did that happen?
Pony took a year and a half to record, write and mix. I started writing the day after my debut album dropped, and it was all done in my apartment in Nashville.
What’s the story behind the album title?
For three years, I owned these mysterious brand-named socks that I wore almost every single day. I never knew where they came from – I think they were part of my wife’s collection when we got married and combined our closets. I never bothered to ask her the origins of them. I wore those socks every day to go work a job I hated, hang with my friends, move apartments, and even when I found out I would be a father. The word sewn into the socks was “pony.” Subconsciously, I saw the word almost every single day growing up, and the socks almost began to symbolize me stepping into adulthood and all the things I had to go through to get to where I am now.
This album deals with growing up. Tell me a little bit about what that looked like for you, and when music came into play.
I was born and raised in Orlando where I learned to play music for the first time around 13 years old. My parents are true children of the 80s, and growing up they continuously introduced me to bands and artists they grew up with which would later influence my musical playing style. I started playing the alto sax in my high school jazz band. After my friends introduced me to worship music and bands such as Switchfoot and Paramore, I slowly grew more in love with the electric guitar and I haven’t let go of it since.
What’s the significance of the album cover? Is the tree you’re sitting beside the one you mention in “the end of the world?”:
So before the world ends in the sea // let's lay under this tall tree
It was actually never part of the plan to have a tree for the cover. The only thing I knew I wanted was for it to be outdoors and to have a raw, greenery feel so it would contrast the first album. I wanted it to represent what real life is like outside my head, which is where the first record took place. When given this direction, the amazing visual arts team known as Working Holiday did an amazing job at getting exactly what I wanted. It was their idea for the tree, and I was immediately in love with it. It’s beautiful and very easy to brand, haha. Also, I’m not sure if this was intentional on their end, but a friend pointed out that there are two pillars on each side, kinda representing this as album two. For now, I’ll say we did it on purpose. And then “the end of the world” was actually written after I received the artwork, so I kinda used it as a reference to better connect the album visually and sonically.
“Punch Boy” stands out as the loudest, most driving and aggressive track on the album. At first, it seems to describe a youthful character who is eager to stake his claim – but there are clearly some intense undertones as you chant, “I don’t wanna die”. Who is Punch Boy, and what’s the story behind this song?
Punch Boy is who I would imagine an alter ego to be for myself. He’s someone I dream of being who is confident and ready to fight and punch through any obstacle life or adulthood has to offer him as he grows up. But that bridge, “I don’t wanna die”, is supposed to show that even the most confident and powerful people can feel insecure, lost and scared. I thought growing up meant that you were supposed to be perfect and have everything figured out, but that’s actually not the case. Punch Boy symbolizes that struggle – and behind the cockiness and narcissism, we’re all people going through similar stuff.
Can you share the stories behind more of your tracks?
“A quiet room with pictures or you” and “the end of the world” are actually pieces sung to and directed toward my younger self. The first one repeats “I’ll never forget you” – as in I’ll never forget the younger, video game-obsessed, energetic toast from the early tracks. And the last one is giving advice to my younger self to hold on to the ones that love him, that growing up is not like what you see on TV, and that I’m begging him to confirm to me that he knows he’ll make it through.
“Take it slow” and “romantic comedy” are more adult versions of love songs where love is more patient, mature and slow-paced – not all about playing games and sneaking behind parents’ backs.
“God’s dance moves” is a conversation with God that shows my questions on religion as I slowly let go of my beliefs. I apologize for blaming him, but not for actually letting go or wanting to do my own thing.
“A piece of your heart” is a message to my late father who passed away when I was a teenager. I felt the weight extremely heavy as I became a father this year. I wanted to pay homage to him for being a great human being and show how I’ll try to do the same for my son. Those are the stories behind just a few.
The album feels incredibly vivid, like sonic snapshots of your life. Is that how you approached writing the songs – trying to capture some of your memories and emotions as vividly as possible through sound?
Yes. I really wanted to use my actual life as a reference for once. Almost every other toast release is either a fake narrative or silly nonsense I made up with my friends, but this time I wanted something that actually represented what I went through in the past year.
Talk me through your decision to move to Nashville. How did that change of scenery affect the album?
Moving to Nashville was hard. It’s still pretty hard. It seemed like a great place to raise a family while focusing on music as my career, and I thought moving to a city where music is the central heartbeat would make it easier for me as an artist, but I still feel lost. Granted, I’ve only been here a year – but I still constantly feel like music is primarily a job or hustle for people here and I haven’t found the few that are making it more for wild enjoyment and for fun. I’m also still trying to find the non-generic music that connects with mine. The more I say it out loud, the more stuck up and snobby I sound, but I hope you get the picture. If anything, this city just encourages me even more to make experimental and genre-less music, because that’s what I feel like it needs.
Speaking of Nashville, where’s the best matcha in town?
Sump Coffee. They have the best everything.
For your debut LP, marcus, why’s your name toast??, you and JOE L worked together as a duo under the toast title. This time, you’re the center of pony. Can you explain the evolution of toast from duo to solo act and how it got to that point? Is Joel still involved?
He’s no longer involved in anything toast. Personal conflicts bled into our professional relationship and it was best to make that call. Really, I feel more free and creative than ever before with my music, and I know that this was where toast needed to be. Ironically, that’s what this album is all about. As you grow up, you’ll go through things in your relationships, and they’ll never stay exactly how they were in college. Things will get discovered and revealed within others when you grow up and it’s up to you to choose who better compliments and fits in with your adulthood, especially when you start to have a family.
Pony explores your struggles with loneliness and depression, broken relationships, a fear of growing old, and the burden of adulthood. Now that they’ve been processed and put into song, do you feel like you’ve found an answer to any of these struggles?
The only thing I’ve found that helps me is having close, meaningful friendships – and I mean the small, tight-knit relationships you keep rather than the idea of a bunch of shallow ones like you would have in college. Also, putting to rest the mindset or idea that adulthood means getting a 9 to 5 job, never having fun, or giving up your dreams, because that’s just simply not true.
I love that blistering guitar tone when “Clay House” kicks in – very The 1975. What pedals, amps or plugins did you use to create that sound?
That sound is super interesting. It’s a preset on Guitar Rig from Native that I use often because, funny enough, it reminds me of the guitar tone from “Sex” by The 1975! I wrote a very simple four-to-five-note riff that anyone could play, but then proceeded to chop it up in tiny steak bites. Half of them I reversed, the other half I pitched up an octave, and the rest I left as-is. So, what you’re hearing is a strange science experiment of random and chaotic choices that really make that glitchy computer sound I was looking for.
You recorded pony in your home studio. From a rack of guitars to your trusty Scarlett 2i2, what pieces of gear win the MVP award for this record?
Funny enough, when it all comes down to it, the true toast sound I can always rely on and used on basically every single track this time was my old Taylor acoustic guitar. I know, sounds super boring, but that thing has been a staple to my sonic appearances. It shines the most in “take it slow”, “pollen” and “mateo in the garden.” I haven’t changed the strings on that guitar in probably seven or so years, and it’s actually quite disgusting. It’s even missing a high E string. Basically, it’s crap, and it’s the backbone of 95% of the entire record.
I think it’s remarkable that you were able to produce and record the album on your own while bearing such heaviness. How did you motivate yourself to keep working?
It’s still crazy to me that I did it all on my own, and not in a bragging way. Sometimes I wonder if I was actually okay while making it because it took a lot out of me, and it all kinda blurred together. The main thing that kept me going was the timeline. I really didn’t want this album to feel too far apart from the previous one because I wanted them to act as two opposite sides of a coin, and I believed that if I released pony two or maybe three years later it wouldn’t carry that characteristic. So, I worked hard every night to make sure it came out just a year later in order to better evolve the storyline of my character.
Who or what else can you credit with making the album happen?
Having trustworthy musician friends helps a lot. I’ve shared tracks in production and engineering with many talented people in my friend group – Reed Seely, Julian Picado and Andre Vargas just to name a few. I don’t want to hear anyone else’s opinions except these guys’ when I show them a song, because I know they’re legit.
You were inspired by several films and paintings while writing – for instance, you cleverly reference Mary & Tim in “Romantic Comedy”. What are some other references listeners might miss?
Some other references would be name-dropping Keshi in “pollen”. He was a huge influence on the early trap-style toast tracks. In “punch boy”, there’s a line about riding around in my escape, “pull shots, get paid”. That’s a reference to my Ford Escape that I’ve had since college and my job as a barista pulling espresso shots to get paid, haha. And in “yearbook”, the first verse literally references the first couple months of me moving to Nashville, skating around and working myself dead in a new town. Continuity is my favorite thing about creating art. I love when things reference other things, because they’re like little easter eggs or love letters to the viewers that the artist or director puts in because they know you’re watching. Stuff like name-dropping a favorite artist of mine or even just saying that I’ll never forget the person I was on the last project is all part of the story. I often fear that I or my music will be forgotten, so with the references, I make sure that doesn’t happen.
Is there a song you really struggled to put together?
God’s freaking Dance Moves was the hardest to put together, and I feel like it still isn’t put together, haha. It’s a very strange arrangement musically and lyrically. It went through several revisions, some that were only a minute long and others that went up to five minutes. I finally landed on this version because it's still open for more thoughts and questions. Nothing is resolved, everything is sudden and all over the place just as my thoughts are about this topic, and the whole thing turns into a confession at the end.
Like one of your influences, Dijon, you play around with a lot of samples and loops. Tracks like “A Quiet Room…” and “Mateo in the Garden” open up with these immersive soundscapes created by chopping and layering, while in “Pollen”, you flip a gospel sample into a laid-back groove. What gear do you use for sampling, and have your methods changed since the last album?
A lot changed from the last album. For one, I tried my best to stay away from MIDI or DI when playing instruments unless the song called for it. I really wanted a raw and tangible sound you could almost see when you heard it, so for the majority of the record, I just used an SM7B, 57 or my iPhone mic to record guitars, drum sounds and piano takes. Whereas the first album relied heavily on finding things off the internet and plugging them in, this time I didn’t care if you could hear the room or any noise. I just knew that I wanted this album to feel real, authentic, and truthful like the lyrics, which meant the instrumentation had to be approached the same way. In terms of sampling, I have no gear. I flipped audio in Ableton by pitching it, warping and chopping with my keyboard and mouse simply because I don’t have money for fancy equipment. One day, I would love a tape machine or recorder to sample records and discs though.
How else has your approach to production evolved between why’s your name toast?? and pony?
As I said earlier, the production changed a lot from the last album because I forced myself to step away from computers and cables when I wanted something used in a song. Miking things I found in my room, baby toys and random sounds I made with my mouth instead of looking through Splice really separates this record from the last.
You were able to make a music video for "Yearbook" with no budget, complete with a garage jam session, skateboarding, and Frisbee on the college quad. Which toast song would you like to do next, and what would the perfect music video look like for it?
I really want to have a video for "punch boy". Some kind of hardcore Paris Texas-style video with bruises and bandages all over my face while someone chases me through a city would be super funny. The perfect video would consist of some sort of single-shot dance number with several takes of art happening at once, like choreography, painting or band playing. Something similar to the videos for “Back on 74” by Jungle or "Sincerity is Scary" by The 1975.
Can you give some context to this line from '“Take It Slow”: I’ll keep it in my head, I’m your favorite bread
Wait…I realized as I was asking this question, it’s because you’re toast. Wow.
Yes, haha. I didn’t want to say that I was their favorite friend, person or boyfriend so I came up with that. Plus it rhymes.
Now it only feels right to ask what your favorite bread is.
French bread all day, baby. I can eat that dry and by itself, as a sandwich, or just with butter. And the best is at Publix.
At the end of the day, what are you striving to accomplish with toast and pony?
My mission overall is to show people the extent of how far art can take you. I never wanted toast to fit in a specific genre or box. It would be very easy for me to write a whole album with indie rock songs or hip-hop songs, but I want to show people that art can be diverse and doesn’t always need to make sense. This polished-up mask that people put on projects and music can sometimes stop artists from reaching their full potential. So, I want to make the messiest and craziest sounding projects I can for a more refreshing taste in a world where genres and boxes are usually the main thoughts from listeners. As far as the record goes, this past year I have learned to grow up more than any other time in my life and, I know I am not alone, so I want this project to connect with listeners who may feel the same.
